Dear Techs Support Team:
Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0 . I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child-processes that took up a lot of space and valuable resources.
In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activities. Applications such as BachelorNights 10.3 , Cricket 5.0 , BeerWithBuddies 7.5, and Outings 3.6 no longer runs, crashing the system whenever selected. I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications.
I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 5.0 , but the 'uninstall' doesn't work on Wife 1.0 . Please help! Thanks, "A Troubled User"
REPLY: Dear Troubled User: This is a very common problem that people complain about. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0 , thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 5.0 . It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed. You cannot go back to Girlfriend 5.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed not to allow this. (Look in your Wife 1.0 Manual under Warnings-Alimony-Child Support) .
I recommend that you keep Wife1.0 and work on improving the environment. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation. The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.
Wife 1.0is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean 2.5, Sweep 3.0, Cook 1.5 and DoLaundry 4.2 . However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program NagNag 9.5 . Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Clothes 2.1 and Jewellery 5.0
WARNING: DO NOT, under any circumstances, install SecretaryWithShortSkirt 3.3 . This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.Best of luck,Tech Support
Wednesday, May 31, 2006
Sunday, May 21, 2006
Ways of treating people
Treating other PeOpLe
An extract from an email:
Five (5) lessons to make you think about the way we treat people.
1 - First Important Lesson - Cleaning Lady.During my second month of college, our professorgave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious studentand had breezed through the questions until I readthe last one:"What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?"Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen thecleaning woman several times. She was tall,dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name?I handed in my paper, leaving the last questionblank. Just before class ended, one student asked ifthe last question would count toward our quiz grade."Absolutely," said the professor. "In your careers,you will meet many people. All are significant. Theydeserve your attention and care, even if all you dois smile and say "hello."I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned hername was Dorothy.
2. - Second Important Lesson - Pickup in the RainOne night, at11:30 p.m., an older African Americanwoman was standing on the side of an Alabama highwaytrying to endure a lashing rainstorm. Her car hadbroken down and she desperately needed a ride.Soaking wet, she decided to flag down the next car.A young white man stopped to help her, generallyunheard of in those conflict-filled 1960s. The mantook her to safety, helped her get assistance, andput her into a taxicab.She seemed to be in a big hurry, but wrote down hisaddress and thanked him. Seven days went by and aknock came on the man's door. To his surprise, agiant console color TV was delivered to his home. Aspecial note was attached..It read:"Thank you so much for assisting me on the highwaythe other night. The rain drenched not only myclothes, but also my spirits. Then you came along.Because of you, I was able to make it to my dyinghusband's bedside just before he passed away... Godbless you for helping me and unselfishly serving others."Sincerely,Mrs. Nat King Cole.
3 - Third Important Lesson - Always remember those who serve.In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less,a 10-year-old boy entered a hotel coffee shop andsat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of him."How much is an ice cream sundae?" he asked."Fifty cents," replied the waitress.The little boy pulled is hand out of his pocket and studied the coinsin it."Well, how much is a plain dish of ice cream?" he inquired.By now more people were waiting for a table and the waitress wasgrowing impatient."Thirty-five cents," she brusquely replied.The little boy again counted his coins."I'll have the plain ice cream," he said.The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table andwalked away. The boy finished the ice cream, paid the cashier andleft. When the waitress came back, she began to cry as she wipeddown the table. There, placed neatly beside the empty dish, weretwo nickels and five pennies..You see, he couldn't have the sundae, because he had to haveenough left to leave her a tip.
4 - Fourth Important Lesson. - The obstacle in Our Path.In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway.Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would removethe huge rock. Some of the king's wealthiest merchants andcourtiers came by and simply walked around it. Many loudlyblamed the King for not keeping the roads clear, but none didanything about getting the stone out of the way.Then a peasant came along carrying a load of vegetables. Uponapproaching the boulder, the peasant laid down his burden andtried to move the stone to the side of the road. After much pushingand straining, he finally succeeded. After the peasant picked uphis load of vegetables, he noticed a purse lying in the road wherethe boulder had been. The purse contained many gold coins anda note from the King indicating that the gold was for the person whoremoved the boulder from the roadway. The peasant learned whatmany of us never understand!Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve our condition.
5 - Fifth Important Lesson - Giving When it Counts...Many years ago, when I worked as a volunteer at a hospital, I gotto know a little girl named Liz who was suffering from a rare & seriousdisease. Her only chance of recovery appeared to be a bloodtransfusion from her 5-year old brother, who had miraculouslysurvived the same disease and had developed the antibodies neededto combat the illness. The doctor explained the situation to her littlebrother, and asked the little boy if he would be willing to give his bloodto his sister.I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a deep breath andsaying, "Yes I'll do it if it will save her." As the transfusion progressed,he lay in bed next to his sister and smiled, as we all did, seeing thecolor returning to her cheek. Then his face grew pale and his smilefaded.He looked up at the doctor and asked with a trembling voice,"Will I start to die right away".Being young, the little boy had misunderstood the doctor; he thoughthe was going to have to give his sister all of his blood in order to save her.
An extract from an email:
Five (5) lessons to make you think about the way we treat people.
1 - First Important Lesson - Cleaning Lady.During my second month of college, our professorgave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious studentand had breezed through the questions until I readthe last one:"What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?"Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen thecleaning woman several times. She was tall,dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name?I handed in my paper, leaving the last questionblank. Just before class ended, one student asked ifthe last question would count toward our quiz grade."Absolutely," said the professor. "In your careers,you will meet many people. All are significant. Theydeserve your attention and care, even if all you dois smile and say "hello."I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned hername was Dorothy.
2. - Second Important Lesson - Pickup in the RainOne night, at11:30 p.m., an older African Americanwoman was standing on the side of an Alabama highwaytrying to endure a lashing rainstorm. Her car hadbroken down and she desperately needed a ride.Soaking wet, she decided to flag down the next car.A young white man stopped to help her, generallyunheard of in those conflict-filled 1960s. The mantook her to safety, helped her get assistance, andput her into a taxicab.She seemed to be in a big hurry, but wrote down hisaddress and thanked him. Seven days went by and aknock came on the man's door. To his surprise, agiant console color TV was delivered to his home. Aspecial note was attached..It read:"Thank you so much for assisting me on the highwaythe other night. The rain drenched not only myclothes, but also my spirits. Then you came along.Because of you, I was able to make it to my dyinghusband's bedside just before he passed away... Godbless you for helping me and unselfishly serving others."Sincerely,Mrs. Nat King Cole.
3 - Third Important Lesson - Always remember those who serve.In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less,a 10-year-old boy entered a hotel coffee shop andsat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of him."How much is an ice cream sundae?" he asked."Fifty cents," replied the waitress.The little boy pulled is hand out of his pocket and studied the coinsin it."Well, how much is a plain dish of ice cream?" he inquired.By now more people were waiting for a table and the waitress wasgrowing impatient."Thirty-five cents," she brusquely replied.The little boy again counted his coins."I'll have the plain ice cream," he said.The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table andwalked away. The boy finished the ice cream, paid the cashier andleft. When the waitress came back, she began to cry as she wipeddown the table. There, placed neatly beside the empty dish, weretwo nickels and five pennies..You see, he couldn't have the sundae, because he had to haveenough left to leave her a tip.
4 - Fourth Important Lesson. - The obstacle in Our Path.In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway.Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would removethe huge rock. Some of the king's wealthiest merchants andcourtiers came by and simply walked around it. Many loudlyblamed the King for not keeping the roads clear, but none didanything about getting the stone out of the way.Then a peasant came along carrying a load of vegetables. Uponapproaching the boulder, the peasant laid down his burden andtried to move the stone to the side of the road. After much pushingand straining, he finally succeeded. After the peasant picked uphis load of vegetables, he noticed a purse lying in the road wherethe boulder had been. The purse contained many gold coins anda note from the King indicating that the gold was for the person whoremoved the boulder from the roadway. The peasant learned whatmany of us never understand!Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve our condition.
5 - Fifth Important Lesson - Giving When it Counts...Many years ago, when I worked as a volunteer at a hospital, I gotto know a little girl named Liz who was suffering from a rare & seriousdisease. Her only chance of recovery appeared to be a bloodtransfusion from her 5-year old brother, who had miraculouslysurvived the same disease and had developed the antibodies neededto combat the illness. The doctor explained the situation to her littlebrother, and asked the little boy if he would be willing to give his bloodto his sister.I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a deep breath andsaying, "Yes I'll do it if it will save her." As the transfusion progressed,he lay in bed next to his sister and smiled, as we all did, seeing thecolor returning to her cheek. Then his face grew pale and his smilefaded.He looked up at the doctor and asked with a trembling voice,"Will I start to die right away".Being young, the little boy had misunderstood the doctor; he thoughthe was going to have to give his sister all of his blood in order to save her.
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